Something interesting, and rather sad:

I started this blog while I was still employed by a major corporation, and felt a strong need to separate my personal life from my work life.  That is one reason I used a pen-name in social media situations, and used my maiden name on Facebook.

Two years ago I was laid off.  Fortunately I was ready, with time to prepare, and I received a nice severance package. Given that the work environment had become almost openly hostile, in a cold silent sort of way, I was happy to go.

While I had nothing positive to say about upper management, I did consider the people I worked directly with, and those I managed, to be friends.  We talked about more than work, we enjoyed conversations about our kids and families, in general we 'hung out' together while working.  I worked hard to make a team environment among my direct reports, and they did seem to work that way.

When the news got out that I was leaving, I was flooded with good wishes and requests to keep in touch.  I shared my personal email address with everyone, and looked forward to being able to develop actual friendships with some. In fact, one of my former direct reports invited me to stay at her house with my family while we traveled on vacation that summer.  I accepted joyfully, telling her "It is such a joy to be able to be friends at last!"

Our family circumstances had changed, and while we still needed me to contribute to the family finances, I no longer had to provide the bulk of the income and the health benefits.  I decided to start over in a new field, one that is personally more appealing to me. In effect, I retired.

That is when the sad part began: of the people I knew from my former job, they all dropped the connection. A couple continued to respond to greetings through instant messenger, but even they did not initiate conversations.  The rest ignored me. And in this day of online communication and connectivity, it is possible to be quite pointed about ignoring someone. Because the people I managed and worked with were spread across the US, we used Yahoo IM continuously to keep projects moving.  With Yahoo, when someone on your contact list logs in, a popup message tells you so.  We would check in, say 'hello,' whenever one of us logged in, just to keep in touch.

Suddenly, not only did no-one say hello, most never responded even to a direct greeting from me.  I had become invisible.

The terribly sad part is that I don't think it's me.  There are just too many people involved, unless there was a threat made to them about connecting to me.  Which would be interesting, but just not plausible.

A simpler explanation is that in the modern world of work, where the lines between personal and professional time have dissolved, people have no time anymore for relationships outside of their professional life. The younger generation may be better with relationships.  But my generation, my secular colleagues, have no one besides their immediate family with whom to share their lives.

What an empty space they live in.